Maternity Leave #3

Took a year hiatus because we procreated yet again! Since we are finally settling in to life as a family of 5...I want to catch up on the stories from not only toddler Maya but toddler Ari, now that they are both making much longer, bolder, and intelligible statements.

A THREE-YEAR OLD IN THREE ACTS:

ACT I:

Flashback to almost 4 years ago in 2014 (because um, 2018!!), Maya had to go to the ENT every so often to get her ear tubes checked. As a motivator/reward, and because it was so close to the appointment, we went to the Dunkin Donuts afterwards. There were lots of people there this one time, and 3 year old Maya looked around and asked, "Did these people all go to the doctor too?"

ACT II:

Bedtime routines are often when we see the comedy come out of our kids. Here is a sample from Maya at age 3:

*I read Maya a bedtime story from Toy Story and at the end I quoted it saying, "Maya, I love you to infinity and beyond!"...Maya said to me, "Mommy, I love you to Bed, Bath, and Beyond!"

*When Ari was a baby, Maya used to talk to his door when he was asleep already. Every night she'd audibly whisper, "Goodnight Ari, I love you, but I don't love you, but I do love you, but I don't. Goodnight!" Ain't that the truth about having a new sibling?

*Mark was using mouthwash and Maya was observing. The bottle was almost empty and Maya said, "You're almost done with your spit drink daddy!" 

*Maya was upset about something around bedtime, then her toothpaste accidentally squirted all over. Maya laughed and said, "It's like a sun shower because I'm happy and sad at the same time." Wow - at age 3 she had more insight into the complexity of feelings than many adults I know.

ACT III:

Insulting one's parents often begins young and innocently, and eventually just turns into tween criticism. I learned fast that with Maya, she was already a pre-teen in her toddler years...without further adieu:

1) "Mommy, your breath smells like turkey poop."

2) After watching a video of a song I wrote and sang called, "Protect Our Ears" Maya said, "Maybe we need to protect our ears from this song."

3) When looking at a callous on my toe. "Look how wrinkly your toe is, it's like Ari's penis."

4) "Focus on your story Mom!" - And I hope one day I can.

THEN...

AND NOW.

.

And scene.

Kids say the darnedest things!

When Maya was around 2.5 years old, she started to assert herself and make her opinions known......when she woke up......at 5 AM. My parents, who had me as their first kid - and I was the epitome of a great twelve-hour sleeper - couldn't believe we jumped into getting pregnant again considering the H - E double hockey sticks Maya had been putting us through with her sleep, or lack there of. 

One morning, around the 5:30-6:00 am range, Maya found her whistle and began running through the kitchen, blowing it as much as her little lungs could. Our windows were open with the great spring weather. 

Me: "Maya, you're going to wake up the neighbors blowing that whistle so early." 

Maya: "I'm not worried."

At the same time that our daughter was beginning to be her tough self, she also began to spontaneously display and profess her affections to her family. In May, 2013 out of nowhere and again in our kitchen while Mark was making her dinner and she played next to him on the floor, she said:

"I love you daddy."

It was the first time she said this to him unprompted. He looked at us both with almost tears in his eyes and pure joy. And as he was about to respond with words of fatherly love and devotion, she emphatically stated:

"I love you floor."

End scene.